I have seen many people suffer and complain about being a victim of the well-known “silent treatment” in my office. The silent treatment is when a person refuses to communicate with someone else because they are angry, upset, or disapprove of whatever they have, or haven’t done or said.
It is a childish way to punish someone. Ignore them. Gaslight them They decide to go silent and close any possibility of resolving issues that might have caused these feelings. It is a very immature way to deal with conflicts and communicate unhappiness and anger. Disappointment. Disagreements. Some use it to avoid arguments. Completely different is when two parties decide to take some «timeout».Timeout requires contentment to cool things up and talk when there is more calm.
Silent treatment hurts relationships
Refusing to talk to someone does not allow the other partie to understand what is wrong nor fix it if possible. This behavior usually leads to confusion, stress, and anxiety on the receiving end especially if they are not aware of what they might have done This lack of communication extends the conflict and leaves the door wide open to surprised resolutions.
The silent treatment is abuse?
For me, the silent treatment can be considered a form of abuse because there is an intent to punishanother person, make them feel unsure, guilty,
Avoiding unhelpful responses
Don’t try to provoke the person who is silent into speaking. This can escalate the conflict. Respéect their wish even if this means walking away even if the situation remains unresolved.
I guess we all might have had to go through this kind of abuse at some time in our lives. Yes, I am calling it abuse because it hurts. Hurts even as physical pain and our body responds to it as such The abuser knows exactly what he/she is doing.
My suggestion, try not to let the perpetrator witness your feelings. He/she knows. Do not insist. Try to focus on something else. The more attention you put or show on this the more you reinforce the childish behavior giving him/her a sense of control., just take it as a temper tantrum !!! Just sit and wait. If the relationship is worth it when it’s over you have been taken out of the freezer. You may have a chance to talk about it and let them know, it’s your choice then,
Remember, you can only change your reaction to this behavior, not anyone else. -Thinking about it, I guess we all might have had to go through this kind of abuse at some time in our lives. Yes, I am calling it abuse because it hurts. Hurts even as physical pain and our body responds to it as such The abuser knows exactly what he/she is doing. This tool can make the person on the receiving end feel powerless, invisible, intimidated, insignificant,, guilty, frustrated, and even angry
Ref. LMHC, CASAC & C.R. Zwolinski
Ines Estrada Vigil
Inés Estrada Vigil 