What is Anger?

Anger is a human emotion; it is natural, and everyone feels angry from time to time. No one can make you feel angry; you decide how you feel. While it is OK to feel angry, it is NOT OK to feel aggressive or violent. This article gives pointers on how you can manage anger effectively and how it affects you.

What Causes Anger?

People can become angry for many reasons. Generally speaking, the way you behave when you are angry is based on behaviors you have learned through your life. The good part is that those behaviors can be «unlearned», leaving room for new ones.

What Does Anger Do To Your Body?

Anger affects your body in many different ways. It increases adrenaline and other chemicals in the bloodstream, which causes the heart to pump faster, raises blood pressure, tenses the muscles, causes dry mouth, upsets the stomach, causes sweating, and basically causes a «fight or flight» reaction.

The way anger affects the body is usually not harmful, but it could be if a person is angry for long periods of time. Being angry for too long can cause a host of health problems, not to mention relationship problems with those around you. No one wants to be around an angry person. To avoid this, it’s wise to learn how to manage anger.

How can you manage anger effectively?

Here I give you some tips to help you cope with this unpleasant feeling:

• Learn to recognize when you are angry.

Think about what happens in your body when you get angry. Do you feel it first in the pit of your stomach? Or do you feel it first in your chest or the back of your neck?

• Learn the trigger for your anger.

What causes you to become angry? Do you feel taken advantage of? Not important enough? Not cared for? Learn to recognize the underlying triggers for your anger.

• Control your behavior.

As you move forward, keep noticing what triggers your anger and pause to choose how you want to respond, rather than react. By honestly naming what you feel and expressing it clearly—to yourself and to others—you build healthier patterns, regain a sense of control, and prove to yourself that anger can be managed in calmer, more constructive ways.

• Stay focused on solving the problem.

If there is a problem, solving it will help you to feel better. Identify the problem that made you angry in the first place and then focus on solving it.

• Use and practice positive self-talk.

Talking to yourself in a positive way helps to make you feel less angry. It will start to calm you and help you to think of things in a more positive way. We know from research that using positive language influences how we think and feel. If you use positive self-talk, it will help you not only to better manage your behavior but also to feel better, more positive, in general.

• Stay calm when others are angry.

If you are calm, you are better able to listen to what others are saying and can better understand their feelings. This will help to avoid arguments from escalating and will help you overcome your anger.